Give expensive gifts or not: that is the question?
It is a well-known fact that Ukrainian and Russian ladies love receiving gifts. For us Ukrainian women, a gift from a beloved man is always precious but not because of the money. In the Ukrainian dating culture, a gift is not just a gift. First of all, a gift is a sign of attention and care and also an expression of your love and admiration.
In today’s article, we are not talking about the gifts as evidence of love and attention, but about (very) expensive gifts, namely: whether Western men MUST buy their Ukrainian women very expensive gifts (mink coats, diamond jewelry, cars, etc.) or not. I have received some messages from my readers with the question if this is usual in Ukraine to buy gifts from $2,000. The reason for this question is the requirement of some Ukrainian women to buy them such an expensive gift because, according to their words, all Ukrainian men buy their favorite woman VERY expensive gifts for certain holidays and buying expensive gifts for them proves the man’s total love for them.
So, guys, buy expensive gifts or not: that is the question?
First, I would like to say that it is not usual that a Ukrainian or Russian woman demands such expensive gifts. It has often been said that the way to a woman’s heart is with the least expected gift at the least expected time. In the case of Russian and Ukrainian women, however, that’s only half of the truth. It is true that in the Russian and Ukrainian cultures, women expect gifts from men they are dating, not out of greed but as symbols of their amorous intent.
It’s the thought that counts, not the money
As is the case with most women, Russian and Ukrainian women love to receive gifts from the men who date them. And just as is the case for most women, it’s not the amount of money that is spent, it’s the symbolism of love and care that matters most.
A Ukrainian woman for marriage who presses her (Western) man for excessively expensive gifts should be avoided. And although it is true that Russian and Ukrainian men buy the ladies they date gifts, they are rarely expensive. After all, as it is in most cultures, it’s the thought that counts, not the money.
Your gifts should be elegant
As is the case with most cultures, the amount spent on a gift can be construed that it reflects the level of commitment intended by the giver. Unfortunately, this might be far from the real intent and instead scare off both parties if they are not on the same emotional wavelength. It’s for this reason that gifts should not include expensive jewelry or other big ticket items. Try to keep your gifts small and inexpensive, but not cheap and trashy.
A gift should also not be considered an attempt to show resources that aren’t there, luring a woman into a relationship for the money. In my opinion, it is equally true that a woman who is either too demanding of money to be spent on her or expectant of gifts is probably spoiled and will no doubt continue to be so if the relationship is allowed to continue.
Talk openly with your Ukrainian woman on this topic
In order to assure a happy and continued Ukrainian-Western relationship, both parties should spell out what they expect from the other in order to avoid a clash over misunderstandings. If either party is marriage-minded and the other is not, it can be virtually assured that the relationship is doomed before it ever got started.
I would advise you to talk with the woman on this issue, about your financial situation and explain her that you love her but you are not able to buy expensive gifts. As I said about, it is the thought and attention that count, not the money. If she does not want to understand you, you should think about if this woman is suitable for you.
In my opinion, you should be wary of being the only one in the relationship buying gifts. Your Ukrainian lady should buy gifts for you occasionally, too – IF she’s really into you. You should also watch out for gestures and emotions that indicate your Ukrainian bride is a little TOO into getting (expensive) gifts. My advice is that you should run to the nearest exit if your woman drops any overt hints about wanting material gratification.
In conclusion, I want to say that by nature the Russian and Ukrainian men are generous and love to buy gifts to their favorite women. However, not every man in Ukraine and Russia can buy a $200-300 gift (this is a high price for a gift!). So, if a Ukrainian woman tells you that every Ukrainian man buys his beloved woman mink coats and diamonds, do not believe her. Only a few men in Ukraine have enough money for these gifts (read the interview with Irina about her experience with Ukrainian men). As for me, it is obvious that the woman just wants to use you if she tells you this.
Questions? Feel free to ask Krystyna, your Ukrainian dating expert 🙂 (s. here: Contact Krystyna)