11 Critical Ukrainian & Russian Dating Questions Answered

Hi,

I have some questions; I would appreciate if you can answer them. Thank you. I have been (and still am) in contact by e-mails (so far), with some women I met on dating sites, I notice most of them are between 19 to 33 years old and…

1). When they send me e-mails they all use the word Dear, is that normal? Usually dear is for the first e-mails you send, or mostly older people use it, or, it is used when you send a letter to a company or something. Is this usual for Ukrainians/Russians?

2). They talk about being poor and about there is hunger and no jobs or jobs pay little salaries, but they dress in expensive looking clothes. Does this make sense to you?

3). Some say they don’t have a cell phone with camera or don’t have a cell phone or computer because they had to sell it to buy food. Some say they have only 2 places with internet because of the war and it’s too expensive to use it. Truth or Lie?

4). Some send 1-2 photos wearing a swimsuit (bikini). Is this normal for Ukrainians and Russians? Are they lying or are they desperate to find a man?

5). In each mail they send at least 2 pictures. Is this normal?

6). Some say “Tell me everything about you” “Tell me your hobbies”. I wonder if some are sincere or if they just want the info to use to scam other people. What do you think?

7). Most of them say they live with their mother, some say their family moved with their grandmother (all have said, women only, most say their father died or abandoned them). In the pictures I have seen only women and little girls who, they are supposed to be their niece. Many say they moved to a farm or far from the city. What is your opinion?

8). They usually reply 2 days after. Some say they only have internet at work. Is it true or they are planning how to reply?

9). When they send me an e-mail, I asked them their profile number and the name of the dating site… Some say, Oh I deleted it because men harassed me, other can’t say that information and they avoid the question. Very few respond to that.

10). Most of them talk to you very affectionate even if they don’t remember your profile. How is that??

11). Some give their cell phone number, some deny having one, I made a call once and she said she couldn’t answer the phone because she was at the gym. No money for food but she can afford the gym?

I usually send them a message to their dating ad and they contact me by e-mail, and I ask them to send me a photo with my name on it so I know they are real, out of about 20-30, only 5 send the photo (I know some scammers post their real photo, but at least I know right away if it’s a man (scammer, perhaps Nigerian) I`m replying to, or the real woman of the photos)

I also ask them to video chat on Skype which none have agreed or said no, so far. I will post about it after (Skype and calls). Once I met by e-mail a woman that behave and looked decent, she even send me a photo with my name on it because I asked her to prove she was real, I said I would do the same after she sends it, but after a few times I kept saying no for money, she said “why don’t you find another woman and ask her for the money and give it to me?”

I was shocked!! Of course I stopped contacting her after that comment. Can you give me your opinion on this one?

PS I am looking for a serious relationship overseas with a European woman. I have done my research on dating scams and I tell them I can’t send money no matter what. I tell them if they want to come and meet me overseas, they have to pay their plane ticket and documents and once they are here, I will take care of the one that that wants to be my wife. Perhaps it sounds harsh but I do this to protect my money.

What is your opinion as an Ukrainian, Krystyna?

**************************************************************************************

Krystyna answers:

krystyna

Krystyna

Hi Turbo,

Thank you very much for your detailed comment message. I apologize for my late replay – last week I was on Cyprus, where I was a speaker on the idate conference, an International conference for Internet dating. Today I am back and have time to reply all your questions. So let’s go step by step (or better said question by question).

1). When they send me e-mails they all use the word Dear, is that normal? Usually dear is for the first e-mails you send, or mostly older people use it, or, it is used when you send a letter to a company or something. Is this usual for Ukrainians/Russians?

Krystyna: Do not forget that the English language for Russian and Ukrainian women is a foreign language, that means they do cannot know all the possible niceties of the English language. E.g. Ukrainians and Russians can be taught in school that it might be impolite not to use “dear” when writing messages and letters. Do not evaluate the English language not used by native speakers very critically.

2). They talk about being poor and about there is hunger and no jobs or jobs pay little salaries, but they dress in expensive looking clothes. Does this make sense to you?

Krystyna: It does make sense for me because I know and understand the Russian and Ukrainian culture. Foreigners can understand this issue only very hard. Ukrainians and Russians live according to the following proverb: Good clothes open all doors but clothes don’t make the man. As you possibly know, Russian and Ukrainian women pay great attention to their appearance (Russian and Ukrainian women are renowned for their beauty).

According to the stats, they spend the greatest part of their income for clothes and cosmetics. Russian women spend on cosmetics about 12% of their income. The Russian market of perfumery and cosmetic products for women is growing annually by about 20% (compare with this fact: In other European countries such as France, Italy or Germany, an annual increase of cosmetics and perfumes revenue is by only 3-4%).

russian woman

3). Some say they don’t have a cell phone with camera or don’t have a cell phone or computer because they had to sell it to buy food. Some say they have only 2 places with internet because of the war and it’s too expensive to use it. Truth or Lie?

Krystyna: Well, this does not sound really credible and trustworthy for me. You wrote that women between 19 and 33 years old get in touch with you. As I know from my experience, almost every young person in Ukraine and Russia has a smartphone.

A standard Internet package in Ukraine costs about $5 monthly. Secondly, the war is in Eastern Ukraine (Lugansk and Donetsk), not in the Central, Southern or Western Ukraine. People in Kiev, Lviv or Kharkov can manage to pay for using Internet at their home.

4). Some send 1-2 photos wearing a swimsuit (bikini). Is this normal for Ukrainians and Russians? Are they lying or are they desperate to find a man?

Krystyna: Russian and Ukrainian women who are successful in life will never publish photos in a bikini or lingerie on the internet. The society in Ukraine and Russia is pretty traditional and it is considered unethical for women to present themselves in this way online.

ukrainian dating bikini

Women who post their pictures in bikinis on International dating sites are just willing to sell themselves (sex sells!) or may be scammers or professional pro-daters. I were a Western man, I would not start communicating with such a woman. I would be looking for a serious woman who presents herself in a decent but elegant way.

5). In each mail they send at least 2 pictures. Is this normal?

Krystyna: Why not? As for me, sending a few pictures is not bad and you can get known a woman better.

6). Some say “Tell me everything about you” “Tell me your hobbies”. I wonder if some are sincere or if they just want the info to use to scam other people. What do you think?

Krystyna: It is very common to ask questions in online dating messages. This is a way to get to know each other better, to get an idea if you have anything in common. How are you going to find out if this woman is a potential match for you or not if you do not exchange any information about your goals, hobbies, friends, family, career, and life expectations.

The aim of online dating is basically to get to know enough about your match to encourage you that they’re genuine and interested to see if they’re someone you’d like to know better. What you communicate about your life, expectations and experience can be rather enlightening about you as a person.

online dating advice

Of course, online communication is not a one-way street. If you see that the woman does not reply your questions back, you should be careful with your information. You should also ask the woman some questions about herself because it helps you check whether or not she is genuine.

7). Most of them say they live with their mother, some say their family moved with their grandmother (all have said, women only, most say their father died or abandoned them). In the pictures I have seen only women and little girls who, they are supposed to be their niece. Many say they moved to a farm or far from the city. What is your opinion?

Krystyna: It is difficult to give you an exact reply on this question. Each family story is different and it may be that most of women still live with their family. But the statement “Many say they moved to a farm or far from the city” sounds a little bit strange. How many exactly say that? As I know, young people move to bigger cities because in the villages there are no job opportunities.

8). They usually reply 2 days after. Some say they only have internet at work. Is it true or they are planning how to reply?

Krystyna: There are no particular rules about how often you should communicate when dating online. In my opinion, there is no right and wrong here, neither inappropriate nor dishonest. Some people prefer to hear from potential matches at least daily, some people say it is sufficient for them to respond the messages just 2-3 times a week.

The variables on this issue are massive. Nobody can say what the right number is or isn’t. Remember, we all are different (that’s why the dating world is so interesting). Each dating and relationship story is diverse, too. If the woman responds you every 2nd day, it is not bad, in my view.

9). When they send me an e-mail, I asked them their profile number and the name of the dating site… Some say, Oh I deleted it because men harassed me, other can’t say that information and they avoid the question. Very few respond to that.

Krystyna: How have you basically approached by these women? If you are registered on a dating site, you should have an overview of the profiles on it. Have you received emails with the women’s contact suggestion? In the “newsletter” case, I would not start any communication with women because, as for me, this way is not reliable.

It seems to me that dating services you have used or tried do not sound really trustworthy. How do you communicate with women if they deleted their profile on a dating site? Which communication sources do you use? Have you searched on the Internet and seen what other people say about these dating services and what experiences they have gathered with its service?

10). Most of them talk to you very affectionate even if they don’t remember your profile. How is that??

Krystyna: It is a red sign that these women might be scammers. If the woman uses flowery language in her messages and lots of descriptive words like you are so attractive, you are my dream man or you look like a perfect man, it is more than suspicious. If you have this in your online communication, I recommend you to stop all communication directly.

This online love is like a wonderful fairy tale. Online communication and romantic letters are not the same as offline dating. So if your woman tells you that she is love with you, I would be cautious about this because the woman could be very different in person.

11). Some give their cell phone number, some deny having one, I made a call once and she said she couldn’t answer the phone because she was at the gym. No money for food but she can afford the gym? I usually send them a message to their dating ad and they contact me by e-mail, and I ask them to send me a photo with my name on it so I know they are real, out of about 20-30, only 5 send the photo (I know some scammers post their real photo, but at least I know right away if it’s a man (scammer, perhaps Nigerian) I`m replying to, or the real woman of the photos)

Krystyna: Talking about the communication via phone and skype. Another obvious indicator that the woman you are speaking with is not genuine is that she never wants to talk on the phone or Skype. A person who is actually developing feelings for you is going to want to see you and speak to you as much as possible.

With technology these days, it is very difficult to have a legitimate excuse for not speaking on the phone or doing a live video chat. Even the basic cell phones have a camera which allows them to use video chat. Don’t be fooled by the women who only want to chat or email with you, especially when they ask for money.

Some final words. I would recommend you, first of all, to use reliable dating services such online dating sites with a positive reputation and matchmaking services (Diolly, Mordinson):

In this case, I am sure you will gain more positive experiences with online dating.

I hope I could help you with my advice and thoughts.

krystyna dating blogger

Krystyna

Questions? Feel free to ask Krystyna, your Ukrainian dating expert 🙂 (s. here: Contact Krystyna)

Love,

Krystyna

Ukraianian Dating Blog

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Krystyna

Krystyna

Krystyna is a Russian and Ukrainian dating blogger and Youtube video coach. On Ukrainian dating blog, you find more than 500 articles on dating Russian and Ukrainian ladies. Enjoy! No time to look for specific information or article? Check my “Krystyna’s lessons on successful dating Ukrainian ladies”. The guide offers you useful tips you must follow on your adventure to find your special Ukrainian woman for marriage. For more info, just click HERE

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