Children Issue in a Ukrainian-Western relationship

Dear Krystyna,

I just came across your blog today, though, I must say, I have been attracted to Ukrainian women for a long time–I was a subscriber to Elena’s for some time, with mixed experience (some scammers there), and I could not help but notice that the women I found most attractive were always from the Ukraine!

So, my question is this–I am divorced and have had custoday of my two children now for many years. My daughter is now 18 and off to the university and my son is still at home. I am 44, and well, I feel finished with the little children raising era of my life. What are my odds of a relationship with a Ukrainian women in her early 30’s that does NOT want to have children of her own?

Best wishes,



Krystyna answers:



Hi Michael,

I cannot recall how many times I have been so certain in how I felt about an issue, only to later realize that given the right set of circumstances, my opinion had changed entirely. One constant has remained throughout my adult life though, and that is a desire for children. As you know, Ukrainian and Russian women are very family oriented and having children is the biggest gift in their lives. We say, “Children are flowers of life”. I have to mention that in our culture the idea of not having kids is an abomination. Therefore, in my opinion it would be not easy to find a young woman without kids and with a lack of desire for kids.

The discussion of whether your Ukrainian-Western relationship will eventually include children is an extremely important one and couples should not evade this issue for long. Finding a special Ukrainian woman for marriage who feels the same is essential for you, but approaching the subject can be difficult. Bringing it up on the first date may be a little too direct, but as soon as things begin to take a subtle turn toward seriousness, intimations should be made.


When looking to meet like minded women from Ukraine or Russia, those who wish to remain childless should narrow their dating pool. I would say career oriented women who enjoy travel and adventure are more likely to share your ideas about not having kids. But as said above, most Ukrainian and Russian ladies are family- and thus children-oriented.
From my experience, I can say that career is not very important to most Ukrainian women and they do not think that having children is likely to be more disruptive to their career. Conversely, Ukrainian women know that being a mother takes a lot of hard work but they are happy to do this job.

Ukrainian and Russian women for marriage talk easily about family and it usually does not take long to broach the subject. Once the topic turns to kids, the initiator will almost always elaborate. My advice in this situation is this opens the door for you to do the same. Be prepared to enumerate the benefits of a shared life of love, minus the offspring. If the woman shares your “life without children” idea with you, this means for you that you have perhaps found your potential partner for life. 😉



Questions? Feel free to ask Krystyna, your Ukrainian dating expert 🙂 (s. here: Contact Krystyna)



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