Today I would like to discuss an important issue in the (Ukrainian and not only) online dating world, namely: the first online dating messages. Almost every man, who looks online for a Ukrainian woman for marriage, has experienced the following: he looks through hundreds of Ukrainian brides’ profiles on AnastasiaDate.com or LoveMe.com with hope to find a woman for life. After a long search, he finds a woman who seems to be someone special and writes her the first message. And … the man waits and waits, and waits for her response. However, the response never comes. Why?
How to write the first online dating message?
I keep getting emails from my readers who ask me why the girls do not reply to their very first messages. This makes many men very frustrated and desperate.
Having thought about these mails and this issue, I wanted to experiment a little and find out why Ukrainian women do not want to give a reply to the messages of some Western gentlemen. What did I do in order to find the answer to this question? I registered on an International dating site (incidentally, the service of this dating site is completely free for women; men must pay, however). I had to fill out the entire profile and upload my pictures. This process took about an hour. But I guess, it is not bad because only after the profile was completed and submitted, the men could view it. Thus, they could get the first impression of me.
Messages that kill a wish of all Ukrainian women!
I didn’d need to wait for a long time until I got the first messages from single Western men looking for Ukrainian women. At that point, I understood why Ukrainian women for marriage do not reply to some men.
Here, I would like to present the three messages which kill a wish of all Ukrainian women to reply to Western man:
Message #1: the message is missing (no words, no questions, no sentences)
Instead, the men only send different emoticons to the women and hope that they get an informative response about the woman’s life, her hobbies and dreams back. I’m sorry but I have to disappoint you, dear gentlemen. I registered about 1 week ago on this dating site and I got about 20 “emoticon” messages. You can imagine that I was not very happy about those messages and had no wish to write back. I am sure that most Ukrainian and Russian women have the same opinion as mine.
I want to believe that Ukrainian women as well as Western men, who register on dating sites, do have serious intentions and do not want to have kindergarten games going on.
Message #2: “Hello!”
As for me, this message is not creative, informative and trustworthy. I have responded to such messages with “hello”, as well. But I did not have a good feeling about the whole “communication” because I thought that the man did not make any effort to write to the woman a couple of nice and interesting sentences. Dear gentlemen, you need only a few minutes in order to write 2-3 sentences for your very first message to the woman who caught your eye (e.g. tell her why of all the women in the dating site you write her, why you like her profile, why you like to communicate with her, etc.).
Message #3: “You are so beautiful, amazing, sexy, adorable…”
Us, the Ukrainian women, we love compliments. But … there is a certain line which allows you to say these compliments regarding physical aspets of the woman. That means that your communication is constantly developing and you reach a certain degree of privacy and intimacy. This is a proved fact that more general compliments work better in online dating life. So use the following words “nice, awesome, fascinating” in your first message to the woman.
Useful tips to write your first mail
Finally, I give you some useful tips what to write in your first mail:
About the blogger: Krystyna is an International dating blogger, coach and iDate speaker. She is on mission to help Western men to understand foreign women better and how to succeed on the International dating websites.
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